High Chair Woes

We know the boy is too little for a high chair. He's not even eating solids. There's simply no need for the high chair.

Pat put him in his big boy chair so he could sit watching us cook in the kitchen. Lovely idea.

Then a swell of emotion came over me. I've been feeling it a lot actually this last week every time he learns or does something completely unexpected or new. As a parent you of course want these things to happen. It's exciting, amazing, nothing like I've ever experienced.

But I was almost pleading with Pat to get him out. He wasn't flopping over like a limp piece of lettuce and he was clearly safe and secure. Pat did not see it but I cried a little. This beautiful little gift that God has given us is getting bigger, stronger and learning more and more every day.

He's ready to grow. I am not.

First Vacation

Well, we've returned safely and sane from our first vacation away from home.

Last weekend, Aedan, my mom and I drove to Rockport, MA to visit my Uncle Summy and Aunt Sharon. Everyone told me that this is the best and easiest age for kids to travel. I'm happy to say they were right! Aedan was fantastic. On the way to Rockport Aedan slept nearly the entire way and we stopped only twice for him to eat. I was actually a little worried about him sleeping so much and a few times zoned in on his chest to make sure he was still breathing! I'm happy to say that he's still alive.

Lots of "firsts" happened on this trip. First time his little toes felt sand, first time his nose smelled the sometimes stinky sea air, first time he felt the crashing waves, first time he heard the cawing seagulls and sandpipers, first time an enormous black-backed seagull tried to eat him, and a sad first time...first time he was away from his daddy :-( This was definatly much harder on Pat than Aedan. But Aedan gave his dad one of his I'm-the-cutest-kid-on-earth-AND-I-love-my-daddy kind of smiles as soon as we came in the door.

Aunt Sharon and Uncle Summy's house is a beautiful old place built sometime around 1900. Famous folk such as FDR and Betty Davis were claimed to have stayed in the house long before the Burr Family owned it. Subsequently, the first night I swore I saw the ghosts of both of those famous folks and the infamous "Lady in the White Dress" who seems to haunt every old home. I had visions of Betty Davis tickling Aedan's toes as he slept in his crib at the foot of my bed. The spooking I felt was all too much for me so I scooped Aedan up and he slept with me for the night! It goes against every safety rule I stand for but I did it anyway. Aedan was my protector that night!

We had a really great time going to the beach and visiting Bear Skin Neck. Aunt Sharon was a fantastic tour guide. We're so thankful to them for showing us such a great time. Aedan purchased his first Red Sox gear much to his dad's dismay. I told him that once the Orioles grow up and start winning some games consistently then perhaps we can get him an Orioles keychain or something :-)

Aedan will be vacationing again this weekend. This time it will be all of us: Pat, Carrick, Aedan and I. We're going to visit Bernie and Steven in North Carolina. Big Brother Carrick and dad will be driving down friday-saturday. Aedan will be taking his first flight on Saturday with me. For only being 3 1/2 months old this boy is learning to travel and getting pretty good at it!

Rolling Over, High Pitch Squeels and Laughter Oh My!

Aedan is going to grow. It's a fact that I have to deal with. I was hoping (unrealistically) that he would stay little for forever! It's not happening which is a good thing medically speaking.

He's now rolling over onto his side. He hasn't quite figured out how to roll onto his stomach yet but I don't think he's interested in taking that step. He's pretty happy rolling onto one side and looking at himself in the mirror in his crib. This morning I noticed that he also likes to put his feet on his mirror which now needs to be cleaned of slobber soaked handprints and footprints.

Squeeling at the top of his lungs has become the norm. He tries to outdo each one by scrunching up his face and squinting his eyes as tight as possible to see how loud he can get. He makes us laugh every time he does it EXCEPT when all of a sudden the clock stikes 7:30 p.m. and the happy squeel becomes an ear piercing scream! We've started calling it the witching hour because in a matter of seconds he goes from sweet, calm Aedan to this irrational monster who acts like he hasn't been fed or slept for days. Forget about consolling him. He's only thinking about two things at this point: boob and bed!

Things are settling in at the Palmer house. I hesitate to say we're in a groove since we never know what tomorrow will bring. But I think in most cases we're pretty good at figuring out what he needs. Aedan might have a different opinion. I'm certain he'll have to go to therapy at some point in his life and will tell his psychologist that his parents completely ruined his life. Upon graduating from high school I'll be sure to give him a gift certificate for 3 free sessions with a therepist "on us."

The Race Is On!

Pat asked my the other day how pumping at work was going. It's not the typical question you get. Examples of typical questions may include:

• How was your day today honey?
• Did you feed the dog?
• What's for dinner?
• What do you want to do this weekend?

Not typical: How is pumping going.

This question among others are actually starting to find there way on the more typical list.

Another question he asked was, "What do you do in the bathroom while pumping?" First of all...why so many questions about the pump? Second of all...how do you expect me to do anything but sit and stare at the two suction cups I'm holding? Perhaps if I had another hand I could actually multi-task my way into doing something else while I'm strapped to an electical outlet!

That conversation got me to thinking about what I'm actually thinking about when I pump. In an effort to do something other than sit on the toilet and stare I've decided to make a race out of it.

Here's how it goes. Let's see which bottle, L or R, can fill up the quickest. L seems to always be more plentiful than R. Why is that? What I can I do to help the moral of R so she's not always lagging behind slowly making L wait until R's caught up. Is there something mechanically wrong with me that one is more productive than the other? Drink more water, eat granola, supplement with Fenelgeek (some herb that sounds too scary to consume) are the general prescriptions for increasing supply. Ok...I'll try drinking more water and eat granola for breakfast. Tomorrow is another day. The race is on!

This is what I've become.

Back to work full time sucks already

Yesterday was my first day back to work full time. This means I'm working a full day of 8:30-4:30. For those of you who know what I do and where I work you're probably thinking, "Come on Sara...it's really not that hard." In reality, the work isn't difficult and I am only a mere 5 minutes from where Aedan spends his day but...

But I am his Mom and he is my boy and I miss him terribly. Yesterday oddly wasn't too bad. This morning however was painful. Aedan woke up a little grumpy and didn't give me his usual cascade of gurgled laughs. Has he forgotten that I'm his mother already? Does he think that I am the babysitter? The guilt I've already been feeling from going back to work has slammed into me once again.

So I sit here counting down the hours until I can pick him up.

Aedan is still as beautiful as ever. I've told Pat that I think of him as our christmas present - each morning I walk into his nursery is like christmas with a perfectly wrapped (and sometimes smelly) little package that it just for us to enjoy.